We ain’t learned our lesson yet

It’s Donnie Iris Day in Pittsburgh, celebrating the local rock hero whose hits include “Ah Leah!” and “The Rapper.”

Incidentally, the correct Pittsburghese pronunciation is “dahw-nee ahrs.” Make sure to drag out the first syllable of the first name and to smush the last name into a single syllable.

My friend James Simon, a sculptor in Pittsburgh, bears an astonishing resemblance to Donnie Iris. Iris fans sometimes insist that he’s the real deal despite his protestations that he’s not Donnie, and so on occasion James has signed autographs with Iris’s name. I don’t think he knows what the authentic signature should look like though.

Actually, when he’s not wearing his Buddy Holly-style glasses, Donnie Iris is starting to look like Steven Spielberg. Or maybe Kevin Kline.