That’s the way the squib kick bounces. Sometimes it bounces your way, sometimes it’s helping out the other guy.
As you may know, Lush Life is my team in the Pittsburgh Bloggers Fantasy Football League. Last week they pulled their martini-swilling selves together, aimed a gimlet eye in the direction of the goal post, and performed in memorable fashion, bringing in 117.77 points and barely beating out NormFro’s 111.40. NormFro is the team of Norm Huelsman, creative director at the Arti Institute of Pittsburgh and multimedia-man-about-town. It was a close game, and characterized by weird fantasy football moments — wanting my opponent’s quarterback to throw a long touchdown to my wide receiver, but then on the next series to fumble or throw an interception.
I can understand why normal fans don’t understand or much like fantasy football followers. We cheer at odd times and are never happy with just a score: We want to know who scored what and how many yards they had.
But as I say, I was triumphant last week in the local blogger league. I lost in my alumni league, but for whatever reason we aren’t spending much energy on trash talking amongst ourselves. That will change this week, though, because my team is thoroughly pounding the team of my good friend Brian, and it’s about time we got the trash party started.
Another reason for me to devote attention to the other league this week is to distract myself from the horror that is my blogger league team this week. I’m ahead by less than 2 points going into tonight’s game. My opponent is PittGirl, the hilarious anonymous blogger of The Burgh Blog, and yet to play on her team are Carson Palmer, T.J. Houshmandzadeh, and the kicker for Cincinnati. Me? I’m resting my remaining shred of hope on Benjamin Watson, the tight end for New England. He’s a good tight end, but is he good enough? And more importantly, will Tom Brady look in his direction?
A big part of why I’m in such a bad way is that I failed to check the injury reports on Sunday morning. As a result, I left in a player who didn’t even suit up for his game. A rookie mistake on my part, and one for which I’m paying dearly.
My real hope is that, if I do lose this week, then others will lose too. So far my team is one of just three undefeated teams, and to my delight the other two league leaders are also in tough straits this week. Suxla Deluxla, the team of our esteemed commissioner TheJim, needs more than 23 points from Tom Brady — not a huge stretch, true, but still not a gimme. The thing is, one of those teams has Tom Brady as their QB, and for me to do well he’ll have to do well also. Meanwhile, Josh Sager’s Star Dot Star Comics have to get more points from Chad Johnson than their opponents get from Randy Moss and Sammy Morris. I feel a little more secure about the outcome of that matchup.
See how this fantasy football stuff confuses a perfectly good football game?
I really like that you called me “esteemed”.
You’re welcome. And I can still call you “undefeated,” at least for a few weeks until I beat you.